My Answer Should Have Been, “Not Yet”

In the early years of ConnectAbility when people were asking about the origins of the organization, I was often asked if I had a family member with disabilities. My answer was always, “no”.

But it should have been, “Not Yet.”

Little I did know what the future would hold for our family. It turns out that both of my younger sisters have children with diagnoses and differences. One of those little guys is diagnosed with autism.

So today is World Autism Awareness Day. I have mixed feelings about the whole concept of “awareness” and have posted about it before. And another time too.

BUT this is Titus. Isn’t he adorable?!

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Titus joined our family as a beloved son, brother, grandson, nephew and cousin. His life began in South Korea and he made his way to his forever home in Texas on Christmas Eve 2015 when he was 3. It was a great mystery to discover what he was like as an individual. My sister & brother in law had very limited communication with his foster family and were not aware of any specific issues. Then of course, transitioning to a culture, language, way of life and family on the other side of the globe is a difficult journey for any child. Language barriers were a big challenge.

But it wasn’t just a Koren – English language barrier. There was something else going on. And it was soon diagnosed as autism. IMG_3817

 

The mystery deepened and my sister and her family found themselves in a swirling vortex of screaming, tantrums, sleep issues, banging doors and ripping magazines. All the while Titus was fiercely loved, wanted and welcomed. We just had to discover the key to his world.

Slowly, his horizons began to broaden. He found his way to therapists and a phenomenal school in Austin. So, his world is music, music, music! He loves to dance too. Watching stuff spin is his jam – washing machines, record players (hipster Austin kid!) and spinning tops are his fave.

He’s super cuddly and snuggly and goes with the flow most of the time. And that smile – how could it not just melt your heart!IMG_3816

So, be aware of autism. It impacts my family and millions of others around the globe.

But don’t stop there. Titus is learning and growing and will one day be a man with autism – not a giggly little boy. We will still be standing by him and loving him and fiercely making sure he has a place in the world. Join me in the effort to make our culture and world more inclusive of people with differences like autism. Like so many of my friends, Titus can teach us to much if we will press in and be willing to learn. He’s a great teacher and a great learner of so many new things.

When you think about it, everyone teaches and everyone learns. 

I dream of a world where people look around and say “who is missing from our __________?” (Insert church, school, play group, community, camp, birthday party, social group, club, etc.)IMG_3814

This is the kind of world that I wish for Titus to be a part of. For his gifts and talents to be understood, appreciated and put into action for the benefit of others.

So wear blue shirts and light it up blue. But don’t save it for one day a year.

And consider your answer to this question: Does autism impact your family?
Is it “no” OR “not yet”?